From “The City” blog from Grace Baptist Church, Grand Forks Sr. Pastor Ray Russell
Wives – Some Suggestions on How to Show Respect – I Peter 3
The primary role of a wife in her marriage relationship is to submit to her own husband – this is defined as a respectful attitude with respectful actions.
I did not have time to get into any suggested ways you as wives could do this so I decided to list some here on the city.
In responding to his desire to work and achieve (Gen.2:15)
- As a wife if you can start to understand how important your husband’s work is to him, you will take a giant step toward communicating respect and honor.
Have you ever said – Thanks for working?
* Tell him verbally or in writing that you value his work efforts.
* Express your faith in him related to his chosen field.
* Listen to his work stories as closely as you expect him to listen to your accounts of what has happened in your life.
* See yourself as his helpmate and counterpart and talk with him about this whenever possible.
* Allow him to dream as you did when you were courting
* Don’t dishonor or subtly criticize his work to get him to show more love in the family.
Show appreciation for His desire to Protect and Provide (Eph. 5:22-24).
* Verbalize your admiration of him for protecting you and being willing to die for you.
* Praise his commitment to provide for and protect you and the family – he needs to know you don’t take this for granted.
* Empathize when he reveals his male mind-set about position, status, rank, or being one-up or one down.
* Never mock the idea of “looking up to him” as your protector to prevent him from looking down on you.
Show appreciation for His desire to serve and to lead (Eph. 5:22-24).
* You tell him you are thankful for his strength and enjoy being able to lean on him at times.
* You support his self-image as a leader.
* Never say, “You’re responsible but we’re still equal, so don’t make a decision I don’t agree with.
* Praise his good intentions.
* Be gracious if he makes a bad decision.
* Disagree with him only in private and honor his authority in front of the kids.
* Give your reasons for disagreeing quietly and reasonably, but you never attack his right to lead.
* Do not play “head games” with him to make him back down and be a “loving peacemaker”.
Show Appreciation for His desire to analyze and counsel.
* Tell him upfront you just need his ear; don’t complain to him later that he always tries to “fix” you.
* Thank him for his advice without acting insulted or like he doesn’t care about your feelings.
* Recognize his problem-solving approach as his male brand of empathy.
* Realize your vulnerabilities, especially among males, and value his protection.
* Counsel him respectfully when you differ with is ideas (you can be right but wrong at the top of your voice)
* Sometimes let him “fix things” and applaud his solution.
* Let him know that you believe God has made us male and female for a purpose and that we need each other.
* Admit that you can sin and thank him for his perception and godly counsel.
Show appreciation for his desire for shoulder-to-shoulder friendship (Titus 2:3-4).
* Tell him you like him and show it.
* Respond to his invitation to engage in recreational activities together or you come along to watch him.
* Enable him to open up and talk to you as you do things shoulder to shoulder.
* Encourage him to spend time alone, which energizes him to reconnect with you later.
* Don’t denounces his shoulder-shoulder activities with his male friends to get him to spend more fact to fact time with you.
Respect his friendships, and he will be morel likely to want you to join him shoulder to shoulder at other times.
S – Sexuality – appreciate his desire for sexual intimacy.
* Well, you can figure out how to do this.